What do you do when you're on the verge of being homeless legally, due to wanting counseling to help ptsd and other mental disadvantages?
Hi Adrian! I know I’m a little late in responding but I spoke to one of my friends who ended up homeless when she dropped out of University. Although it is obviously for different reasons, I thought you might like to know what other options are available. You can ask the council for help and they must assess your situation within 28 days and you might find you’ll qualify for emergency home accommodation.
Depending on your age, they may be able to place you in a home/hostel/temporary family for a temporary time whilst you find other options.
At 16/17 it is normally social services who deal with it.
Otherwise, charities are your best option. Try local shelter charities etc and all shelter.com have good advice.
Best of luck and stay safe.
How do you get rid of spots?
Spots are a tricky one! It’s natural to get some acne as you pass through the teen years and everyone’s skin is different so it’s about trial and error until you find what works best for you. I used to use products like Micellar Cleansing Water, Cetaphil wash & scrub. Exfoliate once a week (but make sure you keep an eye to find out if this helps/hinders as it can make sensitive skin worse!). Products with tea-tree in them are often very beneficial to at least calm the redness, if not remove the spots. Proactive+ can be good!
If you’ve got sensitive skin, Simple do a wonderful range of skin care products.
Are you super stressed? That can increase acne.
Don’t pick/pop them if you can...that only spreads the infection.
If all else fails, and it’s really knocking your self confidence, visit the doctors. They can often provide creams and antibiotics to help you tackle acne. I was on a cream called Duac & a tablet called Lymecycline but there’s also accutance, the pill, oxcytetracycline, epiduo cream and many more.
Unfortunately as I said, it’s trial and error to find what YOUR skin wants. Good luck and don’t let them get you down if you can - remember everyone gets spots even if it feels like it’s just you
How do I deal with my friends finding out I self harm? I don't want my parents to know but I know I should ask for help.
Hi Bryan. First of all, I’m glad you’ve acknowledged that you do need to tell someone. That’s often the hardest step and I’m actually really pleased you can do that!!
Secondly, I assume you’re asking because your friends have been fairly concerned. This is a good sign and it means they truly care. If you feel able to, maybe pick 1 or 2 friends you’re comfortable with and try to talk to them. Tell them as much or as little as you’re comfortable with for the first time, it’s just good you’ve opened up those lines of conversation.
Now, about your parents. Firstly, ask yourself why you don’t want them to find out. Are you scared of their reaction? Will they hate you? Will they not support you? The truth is, you won’t truly know how they’ll react until you try. It is the scariest thing but in 99% of cases all your parents want to do is support you. Remember also their initial reaction won’t be their reaction forever, it’s a hard situation for everyone involved but they’ll learn to adjust often.
If you know your parents finding out puts you at risk/safety at risk, then talk to another trusted adults. Teachers are wonderful. Your Giidance system is vital in a situation like this as they can help you in school and can also help you access the help you deserve - whether it be in school therapy, out of school counselling or medication. It’s also good to have someone you know you can go to. If you dislike your Guidance staff, pick a favourite teacher and chat to them. They’re always willing to help and they can e more than you’ll expect!! They are also a good bridge between your parents and you, if you do t know how to start the conversation maybe.
If you feel you can’t do any of these things, go to your GP. If you’re in the UK & over 16 they can’t share your info with anyone else.
Or try online services: YoungMinds, SelfHarn.co.uk, Samaritans, Childline etc etc.
Also remember next time you want to hurt yourself, you don’t deserve it no matter what you believe. There’s other alternatives (check out the articles on our website for 50+ alternatives to self harm).
Take care! - Rebecca x
Prelims are coming up and I’m scared I’m going to fail. How do you handle stress because I still can’t do it!!! I go to Zuni next year and I need to be able to handle it better.
Hi Antonia! I totally understand how much pressure there is when it comes to tests and exams. I know you want to do well, but no number, letter or any grade can define your worth. At the end of the day; everything will be okay.
When dealing with revision I like to prioritise my work. Maybe try making a revision timetable and plan when you are going to study. Remember to leave time for breaks. Put the subject you struggle with most or the subject you want to do the best in first. Within the subject, study the topics you don't understand first rather than going over what you already know.
Make sure you have a tidy place to work, clear out a desk or even if your just sitting on your bed, don't have papers everywhere. Make sure you are comfy and relaxed and have some snacks on hand so you don't have to get up. It's important to have a drink too because this will help you feel better. I like to have a glass of water or tea (herbal tea if it's in the evening as you need to sleep). You could also light a candle to help you relax.
Turn off distractions, don't have the tv on and turn your phone, laptop, or iPad off unless you are using them to study. Electronic devices can be good but you should turn social media and game notifications off. There are lots of apps and learning games you can play that might help you, and quizzes and even practise papers online you can use. I like quizlet and duolingo if you are learning languages.
On the topic of the internet and electronics, I find YouTube a good learning resource. Sometimes it's easier to see and hear someone explain something rather than reading it out of a text book. My favourite study channel is Eve Bennet, but depending on what exams you are doing you may or may not find her helpful.
Making fancy notes and using flash cards is a good way to remember things. Try writing in different coloured pens and even different coloured paper. It has been proven that different colours help people to remember more easily!
Having a friend to help you study has also been helpful for me. Make sure it's a friend who you know will help you focus rather than become a distraction. You can test eachother and share study methods. It will also make you feel less stressed and know that your not alone with the stress of revising.
When you get to uni, try revise as early as you can so you don't have as much to do last minute and try to keep on top of your work. Just try your hardest and take good notes in class.
If you start to feel overwhelmed, treat yourself. Take a bubble bath, watch an episode of your favourite tv show. Have some time to do something you want to do. And remember not to let exams take over your entire life. I comepletly understand how you feel as I have broke down crying over exam stress before, so please know that you are not alone. If you haven't already, try reading some articles on TWE as we have many articles about this. Also, my last tip is to get a good nights sleep the night before! Don't stay up all night revising. I hope some of this helps you, and good luck. At the end of the day, exams aren't the end of the world. -Ella
Hi there, I am lesbian and I have a crush on another lesbian A REALLY BIG CRUSH... so anyway erm she got a girlfriend the day I was going to ask her out and she only said yes to the other girl because she didn't want to ruin their friendship but that also means they won't break up because they'd hurt each others feelings. I know this sound mean and jealous and salty but what should I do? Thank you I hope you can understand, sorry
I totally understand! I think the best thing you can do is tell her how you feel. If she feels the same way she may understand that what she’s doing to her friend is wrong. I hope everything works out xx -Joey
I am seriously worried about my grand daughter aged 13. Her parents are divorced. Her mum moved to Spain and she didnt want to go. She lived with me and was happy with friends going out and sleepovers. In April her dad said i was too old to look after her and she lived with him for 4 month. He verbally abused her, she lived 2 jra away and had to change schools. She was devastated and since yhen her life has fallen apart in her eyes. Her mum said to her if not working with dad then you have to come live with me in Spain. Her mums work means she comes home 3 or 4 in the morning and sleeps best part of of the day. She is about to start a spanish state school.
She now has social anxiety will noy talk ti others and on friday her ild school contacted me that she has been contacting an old school fiend from when she was living with me and was going on suicide snap chats. I am terrified she will harm herself. She sits at home all day with no friends and scared of the day she has to go to school. Even begging me not to bring her birth certicate to her mum which she needs to start school. She has also tild me she is not sure of her sexuality. She talks ti me but not her mum. Her mum's friend asked her if she was enjoying living in spain. She said no. Her mam gave her the bad eye then Shouted at her for telling the truth. Her mum wants it to work but i know my grand daughter unless with me in uk. How can i help jer
Hi Julie, I am so sorry that you and your grand daughter are going through this. I think that you all need to sit down and talk about this (you and her parents and your grand daughter). If not possible in person then through Skype or even over the phone. You need to tell her parents that they need to take her opinion into consideration. Maybe you could introduce your grand daughter to our website, I'm sure some of our articles could help her and we would be happy to talk to her if she needs it. I really hope you manage to sort this, and if you need any more help please let us know. -Ella
Well I'm lesbian and I just got a girlfriend and she is so much prettier than me and more popular we both love each other and I know it isn't all about looks but I genuinely AM ugly and she is gorgeous. I have good skin with no spots or freckles, nice eyes but really horrible eyebrows and the thinnest lips ever but I'm allergic to EVERY type of makeup I've tried and I just want to look at least decent I know this sound kind of pointless but me and my girlfriend both self harm people know that she does but no one know about me and I have severe anxiety especially over my looks please help if you can what do I do if I'm way too ugly compared to her - Harriet
Hi Harriet! It is normal to feel like this especially in a relationship with someone, it is easy to think that you're not good enough for them. You need to remember that there is a reason she is your girlfriend, and she might even feel similar to this about you! Try talking to her about this, and you can both help each other. You don't need makeup to look nice, you may have heard this many times before but it is true. You could talk to a doctor about your allergies and they may be able to recommend some makeup that you can wear and is safe for your skin. Good luck and if you need any more help please ask! -Ella
What should I do about my "friend" who pretends to have depression and self harm? I know you probably think like how do you know the pretend but they even told me them self that they're faking it for attention and she doesn't know that I self harm etc and it really stresses me out, and even triggers me! What should I do?
Hi, I understand how frustrating this is, I had 2 friends who did this and the most annoying thing about it was having to see one of my other friends who was actually going through this suffering in silence. I think you should talk to your friend, and tell them that if they are self harming they should see a professional. My "friends" would post on Snapchat about it for attention instead of doing this which is another sign that they are attention seeking. My two "friends" also would encourage each other to do this which was part of the problem. I am no longer friends with them for more than just this reason, and if your "friend" continues to do this maybe you should find better friends. I hope this helps and there may be some articles on our website that could also help you, -Ella
hi. my name is Lucy and I'm 15 years old and i think i have depression. I want to make an appointment to see my doctor to see if i can find out whether i do , but i don't want my parents to find out because they don't think depression is "a real condition", like making the appointment is fine, but finding an excuse to leave the house to go to the appointment is hard. i can't use the excuse that i'm going to a friend because all my friends live too far away and I can't say I'm going shopping because I have no money at the moment, what do I do?
Hi Lucy. Do you have a family member or friend who could take you to this appointment so your parents wouldn't suspect? If you go to a school which has a student support, they might be able to sort your appointment out and take you there during school time. If none of this works, you could try and get your doctor to explain that depression is a valid illness to your parents. You could ask them to talk to your parents over the phone or if possible either your parents visit your doctor or your doctor visit your parents. I hope this helps you a little, and some of our articles on our site might help you too! Good luck and let me know how it goes. -Ella
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