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Advice

Best Friend?

13/11/2018

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My best friend started getting really mad at me for every little thing and now she has refused to talk to me or even look at me for 5 days and I don't know what to do. She never gets mad over anything usually now all she ever is, is mad and I miss my best friend. I need advice.
​Taylor


Hi Taylor, thanks so much for contacting us. It sounds like you're going through a really hard time, whenever things go wrong in a friendship it can be difficult to deal with. If you haven't done anything to upset your friend and your friend is just getting mad at you, that sounds like an unhealthy friendship, so when the time is right and you feel able to, you might want to speak to her about the way she's made you feel.

You may also want to speak to her and ask her if anything is making her feel so unhappy at the moment. She may be unintentionally taking anger out on you, which isn't fair for you and isn't your fault, so you may want to ask her if anything has upset her recently. 

In the meantime, you might find it helpful to talk to other friends, school mates or family to help you through. Good luck. 
- Emmy

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Asexual? Or just not ready...

13/11/2018

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How do you know if your asexual or just immature? Can you be asexual if you aren’t disgusted by the mention of sex, but would never think about that sort of situation in respect to yourself? (Sorry if any of that sounded offensive, I’m a little confused myself and your comments about your earlier confusion resonated with what I’m feeling).
​Kate
​

Hi Kate! Thank you for contacting us. Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or having a low interest in or desire for sexual activity. Asexuality does not necessarily have to be finding the idea of sexual activity disgusting, or being disgusted by it.

The first thing to consider is how you would react to being in a situation which involves sexual activity. If you think you would be totally uninterested or have no sexual attraction, then it is possible! It could be, however, that you simply do not like them enough to feel comfortable having sexual interactions with them.

My best advice would be to see how you feel in different sexual activities and interactions. If you feel negatively towards them, it is possible you could be asexual, and it would be worth looking into it more!

Another factor to consider is your age and maturity levels. If you're not of consenting age, that could be why you never think about the situation. Chances are you won't think about it unless you're of consenting age to it. I don't think maturity levels would determine whether or not you think of yourself in a sexual situation, however if you have quite a low maturity level it may explain why you could be immature when thinking about anything sexual.

Good luck! I hope you work things out! Katie x
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Dealing with stress

13/11/2018

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Hey. Lately I’ve been having a lot of stress problems and I’m just wondering if anyone has any advice on how they dealt with stress?
​Brooklyn
​

Hi Brooklyn! Thanks so much for sending us in a message. Stress is a natural part of life and it can actually sometimes be beneficial, as it allows us to realise when things need prioritising and resolving. However, stress can also really put a strain on our lives, and too much of it is unhealthy. 

As someone who completely understands what it feels like to have a lot of stress, my top tip is that it's so important to make sure you make time for things you enjoy, and things that help you relax! Even carving out 30-60 minutes a day of you time will have a huge impact on how you feel, because it gives you the time to reflect on the day and calm down. Personally, I enjoy watching my favourite TV shows or reading a book during me time, but you can do whatever you like!

My other important bit of advice would be to make sure you talk to people, if need be a professional. Keeping stress bottled up only adds to the stress, so it's so helpful to spend some time telling others how you feel. If you feel you need more than the support of friends and family, you can talk to your GP about counselling services by you.

As well as this, it's sometimes helpful putting your stress into categories of things you can resolve and things you can't. For instance, if you're stressed about an essay you haven't written yet, you can take steps to resolving this (by doing your essay). If you're stressed about the fact your delivery hasn't arrived, there's not much you can do about that, so you can then work on asking yourself why you're so stressed and helping yourself calm down. I hope your stress starts to fade soon, and that these tips help you! - Emmy x
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Teenagers With Experience is an organisation created to provide teenagers with a platform to share and help others from their own experiences while also educating others on different topics. We aim to provide a safe space to all teenagers around the world and support others. You can contact us via email, social media or our contact form found on our home page.
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