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By Alexis The first time I heard the word “gay” was at school. I was 13, and my friends talked about a guy in 9th grade who kissed another guy. What a scandal for such a conservative community that thrives on gossip.
I was also a guy who “would kiss another guy.” I was impressed that I wasn’t an exceptional case; many other people are into that. With a mixture of denial and adrenaline rushes, I explored the queer world. With a few clicks on my keyboard I started learning everything about LGBTQ+, I read research, but also watched queer TV shows and learned a lot about queer culture. Completely scared to come out to anyone, I started making queer online friends and talking to them. We stayed up all night discussing the latest heartstopper season, analysing Taylor Swift’s songs, and spitting out our latest high-school drama. As I delved deeper into this queer life, I started finding my community. As I resumed my journey in exploring the queer world, I gained the courage to come out to my loved ones. I came out to my sister, cousins, friends, and everyone I loved. I spent hours talking about gay culture with them, and I became openly gay, helping all the queers in that conservative town fully accept themselves. My community took a more vivid shape. Today, as shame from my sexuality turned into pride, I’m still excited about so many things I have yet to explore. I’ve never watched a RuPaul’s episode, I’ve never been to a parade in Pride month, and I’ve never had a real boyfriend. More importantly, I’m excited to explore how my community will look in a few years.
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