Exactly 8 years ago, I heard the words 'I love you’ from someone for the first time. Believe me when I say that I was never expecting that these words would mean so many different things to me in today's time. While I was remembering my first boyfriend, whom I dumped ruthlessly, I got a text from my current boyfriend. For a second, I got scared thinking, 'How on earth did he sense that I was thinking about some other guy?'
I opened his chat, and there it was. A picture on WhatsApp in 'one view.’ He was wearing a piece of jewellery that he bought and never mentioned. He tells me everything, and I know he left this one out on purpose. Now, how am I supposed to tell him that it doesn't suit him? Forget about suiting; it's looking ugly. What did I do about it? I didn't hurt him with my harsh judgement. I asked him to exchange it for another size. It was a chain that looked like a choker, and I asked him to get a bigger one (one that hides beneath his shirt) for his own sake. You must be thinking, how did I get to suggesting jewellery in the middle of celebrating 8 years of my first I love you. It's a simple circle. You treat the love of your life with kindness now because you understand how the little things hurt you so much 8 years ago.
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I feel as though every woman has experienced this. The magical moment where Prince Charming turns into a caveman. Whether it’s a burp during dinner or a fart while watching a movie. For me, it was a bit more extreme. One Wednesday afternoon, while strolling down my neighbourhood with my boyfriend, he told me to wait a second. The next second, he was pulling down his trousers and rushing to the fields. My phone lights up, and it’s a text from him to go get baby wipes. You could not believe my disgust. He then went on to complain about how late I was. No wonder people say I’m a pushover. This was the moment I knew we were through.
All of us have experienced that moment. And then, there comes a time to wonder, are all men like this? Are there any men at all? Or do they all stay boys? Why is society tolerating men becoming more and more immature through the years while investigating our every flaw? Why are men expecting us to stay with them after that behavior? Believe me or not, I think whether you walk into a bar or a palace, you’ll still find a guy farting. Or picking his nose. It’s just that this behaviour has become so normalised that we’re all pretending to be okay with it. Men do exist, just not in the fantasy/romantic way we all want them. They might give you some fantasy moments, like a rose on Valentine’s Day or buying you dinner, but that's about it. There’s no prince on a white horse. Some men do stay boys forever. Peter Pan is not just a fairytale, ladies! Some boys believe it’s okay to comment on their girlfriend’s face or pout in public. The new trend on TikTok where men call their girlfriends “mommy” needs to be studied. Society will never stop tolerating men and their flaws. Society will always love the fact that they exist and treat others the way they do, just because society is made of them. The set of rules is made by and for them. Men expect us to stay with them because there’s this myth of the needy woman, of a girl who needs constant reassurance. A girl who would never run from a relationship, and that model is set in rom-coms. In conclusion, ladies, never settle. When someone is asking what you offer to the table, show them your manners. And don’t expect anything less. Expect chivalry or at least generosity. Not a caveman.
During my recent visit to my school, after experiencing that environment all over again, I was taken down memory lane. It made me feel quite ecstatic about how life was in school and how it has shaped itself now that I am in college. This journey, when I look back, has been quite surreal, and I could not have asked for more.
Since change is the only constant in our lives, transition is an inevitable part of it. Transition serves the role of a bridge, facilitating our move from one phase of our lives to another. It involves leaving behind all your past routines and starting a fresh journey ahead. As battles are fought and won on the battlefield, similarly in life as well, heights of success are achieved when we get out of our comfort zones and strive hard to achieve any task. Transitions are all about stepping out of your comfort zone, as moving into a new phase presents new conditions and challenges. Therefore, it's important to adapt to them and flourish despite these obstacles. The first phase of this transition is the school, which, being our second home for years and where one spends their childhood, naturally creates an emotional bond with it. Thus, bidding adieu to our school and moving on to join college can be quite overwhelming. This transition from school to college reminds me of how the seeds in the form of white puffs in a dandelion flower disperse into the air and get settled at distant places to start a new journey ahead. The journey of school can be visualised as a common road where everyone follows the same path. However, in its end, there are various bifurcations—different career options, each leading to a unique destination. School life can also be envisioned as a bird confined to a cage, and with the commencement of college life, the bird is set free from that cage where it has spent its life so far, enabling it to fly high into the horizons of the sky. Transition takes place as there is a change from one phase of life to another. The roots of this transition from the school to the college were laid back in grade 11, where we all chose our streams with the career choices in our minds. In this academic transition, the previous one smoothly gives way to the newer one to take control, which in turn helps us to flourish further in our lives. As the school has given its portion of requisites to a child, it has shaped them to a certain extent by laying the foundation of their career. However, the role of the college is that of icing on the cake, which is so crucial as it proves to be game-changing in the whole scene. While being in school, one generally lives in a very protective environment provided by the school as well as by their family members back at home. However, by being in college, one becomes all the more independent in his/her respective life. This independence brings with it a host of responsibilities. Earlier in school, the decision-making power rested with our parents; however, now the ball lies in our court to make certain major calls relating to our lives, which affect us substantially. The second phase in this transition is the college or university, which is a crucial factor in one’s scholastic journey, as the learning and the experiences gained during this very pivotal phase of our lives will ultimately govern and determine where we’ll land in our future. Another important aspect of college life is that it teaches us the fine art of professionalism. This indispensable skill polishes our intellect, conduct, and behaviour in a way that our way of dealing with things becomes all the more refined, requisite, and ideal for the required job. Moreover, the camaraderie that one develops along with their journey is surely a lifelong longing. Our peers often end up in similar professions, which makes it easier for us to stay in touch even longer. Leaving behind the rat race of marks that we’ve all been through, college life provides the perfect platform, offering us the opportunity to master the vital skills that are prerequisites for our profession. Putting in extra effort over and above this certainly gives us an edge over the others and boosts our careers to the next level. Personally, being able to directly experience the university before going to college has been a wholesome experience altogether. The added advantage of studying in a university is that one gets to experience certain things that colleges are generally devoid of. The education that we gain and combine with the experiences of life plays the role of a stonemason in our lives. All this brings the best out of us, provided our way of looking at things is optimistic but not pessimistic. A failure would teach us something that even success cannot. The obstacles in our lives at every step are a testament to our character and how we respond and bounce back in such critical times. Looking forward, this new journey looks promising, as the learnings in this short period have been quite a few. Being humble in our attitude yet having that glaring attitude to conquer anything when the demand of the circumstances is such, we march ahead with a lot to experience, learn, and cherish forever.
Setting and achieving goals is crucial for a successful and meaningful life because they give direction, self-worth, and a feeling of purpose. The most fundamental strategy I employ is objectivism, an Ayn Rand-developed philosophy that emphasises the value of individualism, reason, and rational self-interest. By highlighting the ideas of productivity, reason, and moral egoism, it offers a framework for accomplishing goals.
Having a strong foundation is cardinal for a strong superstructure, and that strong foundation for achieving your goals, is objectivism. To pursue your objectives and pleasure, you must modify the principles of objectivism to fit your particular situation and set of values. We will look at some of the systems that objectivism supports, their importance, how we can apply them in our daily lives, and some real-life challenges that people are mostly facing with this error and how we can use this philosophy to overcome challenges. Firstly, you must be able to define your goals just as objectivism encourages. Consider defining your goals, making sure they align with your values, desires, and rational self-interest. This clarity saves you from chasing arbitrary or contradictory goals by helping you grasp what you want to accomplish. Secondly, practice rational thought. Apply logic and critical thinking to assess your objectives and the procedures required to reach them. Identify, evaluate, and successfully handle problems in place of making judgments based on feelings or illogical ideas. Not only that, but you can also succeed in achieving your goals by practising consistency and honesty in your activities and adhering to a code of ethics that is in line with your beliefs. Accept responsibility for your decisions and deeds, and don't hold other people responsible for your results; keep your attention on the important things and stay away from distractions. These virtues that objectivism advocates for, such as upholding moral integrity, self-responsibility, and rational self-interest, are among the other important components that will guarantee that your goals pursuit stays morally upright; hence, it is very cardinal to put these theories into practice because you will be able to identify your true ambitions and develop a strong sense of passion for them, which will increase the likelihood that you will remain dedicated and put in the necessary effort to reach them. It will also assist in making well-informed decisions that are consistent with your priorities and values, allowing you to devote your time, effort, and resources to endeavours that have personal significance. Not only that, but it also helps in decreasing the chance of expensive errors that could undermine your objectives. Upholding individualism is another approach to using objectivism to accomplish your goals. Nowadays, people are dealing with issues like social pressure, fear of rejection, and peer pressure. Instances of evident difficulties include individuals who have been significantly impacted by peer groups. To fit in with a particular group, some teenagers have given in to peer pressure and engaged in risky behaviours, such as substance abuse. Many have also faced the challenge of social media comparisons on the internet. Constant exposure to carefully curated photos and stories on social media has resulted in fear of comparison and judgement. This is so because many compare their lives to the seemingly flawless accomplishments and lives of others online and end up being discouraged from embracing their uniqueness and authenticity, resulting in making decisions that do not align with their personal goals. These experiences have discouraged many people from pursuing their individualistic aspirations, but to break free from all of these ties, people must apply objectivism by upholding individualism because when they do so, they will not only accomplish their own goals but also enrich the world with their varied experiences and viewpoints, making it a more vibrant place for everyone. Along with helping one's behaviour become more in line with who they are, this will also promote well-being and a sense of satisfaction that eventually leads to a deeper, independent sense of meaning and purpose in life. Giving it your all fervently is another essential component of reaching your objectives. Accept responsibility for your decisions and deeds, and don't hold other people responsible for your results; keep your attention on the important things, and stay away from distractions. Surround yourself with people who can offer you helpful advice that will hone your objectives and tactics. Make constructive criticism a tool that enables you to discover your blind spots and pinpoint your areas of weakness and growth by making the required adjustments. Receiving feedback from others, especially from people with greater experience or skill, can also yield insightful information that improves work quality and excellence. Lastly, keep learning, growing, protecting your property, and remaining loyal to your principles. By absorbing knowledge from others, you can enhance your abilities and adjust your objectives and strategies in light of fresh insights and encounters. Aim to accomplish your goals while adhering to your morals, respecting the rights of others, and never compromising your essential principles. In conclusion, Objectivism is key, as it provides a powerful philosophical foundation for achieving your goals. You can define and pursue meaningful goals that result in success and happiness for yourself by respecting individual rights, understanding, applying, and aligning with your logical self-interest, and embracing reason. Maintaining self-worth, productivity, and integrity are essential components of a happy journey towards your goals. Indeed, objectivism is the cornerstone and strong foundation upon which one can achieve their goals when applied.
As a young teenager, you are figuring out most of the stuff about you: who you are, what you like, who your true friends are, what your aesthetic is…what do you believe in? In this article we will be discussing the impact and importance of religion, why you need it, and maybe even why you don’t. Stay with us to embark on the journey and discover the wonders of ancient times, where and when these spectacular religions and moral values started.
First of all, what is religion? That is a tricky question, but let’s start off with the “main” religions, and by that I mean the most popular, and their own core values and morals.
I am a Catholic, a branch of Christianity. I love being a Catholic. I love my God, and I love my religion with its impressive core values. I was baptized and went through all the training of knowing what a Catholic is all about, like Confirmation and Eucharist. I have started reading the Bible and knowing the stories ever since I was little, and I haven’t appreciated the Bible until now that I am 16 years old. Even when I was an atheist, I still loved the teachings of the Bible. To me, religions teach you good moral values about how to become a better person to yourself and to others. Religion also teaches us discipline we must have for ourselves. For example, in Buddhism, a good moral value story is “The Buddha and the Hungry Tigress”: Once, in one of his past lives, the Buddha was born as a prince. While walking in the forest, he saw a starving tigress struggling to feed her cubs. The prince felt deep compassion, realizing that if she died, her cubs would suffer as well. Unable to bear their suffering, he sacrificed himself to feed the tigress, demonstrating ultimate selflessness and kindness. Moral: True compassion means selflessly helping others, even at great personal cost. Discipline story of Islam “The Patience of Prophet Muhammad”: An old woman used to throw garbage on Prophet Muhammad daily, but he never reacted with anger. One day, when she fell ill, he visited her with kindness. Touched by his patience and compassion, she embraced Islam. Meaning: Discipline in Islam means controlling emotions, responding with kindness, and staying patient even in hardship. In conclusion, even if you do not wish to pursue any type of religion, I suggest you read and maybe even listen to its teachings to help become a better person. Religion is here to show humans the moral way and show us core values such as kindness, discipline, respect, patience, compassion, and most importantly…love. |
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Teenagers With Experience is an online organisation created to provide teenagers worldwide with an online platform to share their own experiences to be able to help, inform and educate others on a variety of different topics. We aim to provide a safe space to all young people.
Please note that the content on this website is created by teenagers. While we strive to provide accurate and helpful information, it is important to remember that we are not professional experts. If you are experiencing a crisis or need professional advice, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional or a helpline. |