How to Get Yourself Out of a Rut

By Tabitha

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I've never quite understood my desperation for change. The endless nights of the same menial tasks kept me stuck in my gears. Having the desire for something more but not knowing how to get there or what to do. I felt like I was stuck in the mud.

This constant desperation had me in a loop of what I could possibly do more, what I could improve on or whether I was enough. I would get myself in a depressive state whenever this would happen.

Getting yourself into a rut is a common experience, in fact, many people experience the symptoms of getting into a rut and don’t recognise that this falls in line with the symptoms of depression. Soon you start to lose interest in the things you once loved. Frustration can begin to kick in the longer you stay in this rut. You can often feel like you might never come out of it, or you've reached your peak. Other factors include everyday feeling the same, feeling unfulfilled or unmotivated, or even wanting to get yourself out of it but fearing the short discomfort that comes with it.

I find myself getting in and out of ruts quite frequently. My desperation for change fuels my frustration whenever this happens and I start to isolate myself or take it out on others unintentionally. A recent example was trying to write this particular article. I struggled to write this article for months, trying to find the right words to articulate how I felt and what process I go through to get myself out of this. However, I was failing to listen to my own advice. I noticed that I was in a rut so deep that I found myself reluctant to get out of it and continued to avoid bettering myself to progress any further.

Sometimes the motivation to get yourself out of a situation doesn’t come to you immediately. Therefore I decided to reflect back on what I had done and achieved. I read through this article, months after I had written something to build upon and noticed I was in a better headspace to articulate and understand myself when I was in this situation. You won’t always recognise the obstacles preventing you from progressing until you overcome them.

Usually, the reason for getting into a rut is because you feel like you've hit a certain milestone. You don't know where to go from there. You need a new goal. Start evaluating everything you've done so far. Think about what you've done to achieve it. Is there anything you need to improve? Consider the other milestones you can hit before moving on. Allowing yourself to fixate on a new goal can help you to remain focused. 

The next question is finding this new goal. What if you don't know what to improve on? What if you don't know what you're working towards? The confused and lost feeling starts to sink in and you begin to trap yourself further in this rut. At this stage, you need to reassure yourself that you've done this before and you can do this again. If this is your first time getting into a rut then see it as a positive break. Often it requires a big change of gears with your drive. You may not know what you need to do but you can start reinforcing your skills to work on your weaknesses. For example, ask for opinions on what you do and who you are, change your focus onto another aspect of life different to the one that got you stuck, take a moment to appreciate how far you’ve gotten.

Getting stuck in a rut is never the easiest position to be in. It's as if you're going to be there forever. It's a huge test of faith, resilience and determination to move forward. However, once you get out of it it’s an extremely rewarding feeling that allows you to reflect on your past and see how much you’ve improved. Know that you have people supporting you through this and it should never be a rush to get yourself out of a rut, take it at your own pace and understand you’re doing all that you can.