Coming out. It’s that seemingly mandatory, horrible, awkward thing that every LGBTQ+ person is expected to do, just because. Society has made us feel abnormal and like we have to announce that hey, we aren’t straight or hey, we feel like a different gender to what we were born or we feel like no gender at all. It’s something we’re told that we have to do and let me tell you - it’s freaking terrifying.
I’m not fully out to everyone. Yes, I’m out to strangers on the internet and I’m out to close friends and my parents but there’s still a whole bunch of people who don’t know and a whole bunch of people who I’m hoping will never find out that I’m out. Why? you ask. For the shame of not being ‘normal’ and for the fear of rejection. My nan was super homophobic. She once got so disgusted at two gay men walking down the road in London holding hands that she turned us around and frog-marched us in completely the wrong direction to where we wanted to go just so we weren’t passing them in the street. I didn’t know that I liked girls back then, but even so, I was horrified at her reaction. For that reason, I refuse to tell anyone on my mum’s side of the family except my mum, for an overwhelming fear that they share her views. My dad didn’t accept me either when I first came out. It was accidental. I’d posted a comment on a video about embarrassing stories saying that my teacher had inadvertently outed me as bisexual to my entire class in school when I hadn’t told anyone at all that I was bisexual. I hadn’t even fully accepted it to myself yet. This was back in the time when all your comments were automatically shared to Google+ and so of course, my father follows me on Google+ and saw this. He then asked me why I didn’t correct her and I said ‘because it’s true.’ He then proceeded to tell me to not be so stupid, of course, I wasn’t gay, I was straight, I always had been and always will be, blah blah blah. It broke my heart. I’m lucky now because, after a long heartfelt letter that I wrote to him, he accepted me and apologised. But not everyone is lucky. The hard truth about coming out is that not everyone will accept you and quite honestly, you can’t make them. You can try to change the way something thinks, but you can’t force it because it just won’t work. People are going to think whatever they want to think, whatever they’ve been told they should think, whatever they think they should think, and that’s just something that you sometimes need to accept. But that doesn’t mean that you have to change who you are or be unhappy. Here are some tips which could be the spoonful of sugar for that hard to swallow coming out pill: 1) Just because your biological family doesn’t accept you doesn’t mean your family doesn’t accept you Family isn’t just blood and DNA - it’s so much more than that. Family is love, laughter, friendship, nurturing, caring, supportiveness, and all of these things put together is what makes a family. So as heartbreaking as it might be that your blood doesn’t accept you, that doesn’t mean you don’t have a family that does accept you, because your chosen family does. This could be a best friend, a godmother, a best friend’s parent or your next-door neighbour. Your chosen family is whoever you want them to be, that’s why they’re chosen and they may be the family to accept you. 2) Try to educate them on what being gay or bisexual or transgender means Someone not accepting you doesn’t necessarily mean that they are homophobic or hate gay people. Some people don’t accept you straight away because they don’t understand. If it’s a grandparent or a parent, they were born in a different time and back then, being bisexual or transgender was completely unheard of - it didn’t even exist. I’ve had to explain to family friends what it is to be bisexual and how I know I’m bisexual even though I’m a virgin and it helped them to understand and be more accepting of me. 3) Don't write yourself off Just because your family is struggling with who you are and how you identify, that doesn't mean that your feelings and your identity is any less valid. Acceptance doesn't equal validity. You need to remember to be who you want to be, who you are inside, and don't let anybody tell you who to be. 4) Just because they don't accept you doesn't mean they don't love you Sometimes families can find it hard to accept something about a family member because it's a shock or they didn't know or they felt like you were lying to them. But them not accepting you doesn't change the fact that they love you. I know that this isn't always the case but in my experience, the love is still there and is always there even if the acceptance isn't there. 5) Times are changing It's 2019. Life in 2019 is a lot different to life in 1919, and people's beliefs are a lot different too. The world is getting a lot more accepting of new identities and that tolerance of people is growing and escalating hugely. You are part of a huge community who supports you for now, and who is to say that your family won't change their mind. Times will keep changing and their beliefs might too. I know it's hard and all of this is easier said than done. But you'll get there. In the meantime, I support you and I love you. Kenzie
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Living life as a human being can be hard at the best of times. We have all these thoughts and feelings which may seem unnatural or wrong, we do and say things that we can't explain or understand and we're all just muddling along the best way we can. You're not alone.
I know how you're feeling. There have been so many times when I've beat myself up over something I couldn't control and even if I could have controlled it, I made a mistake and hated myself for it. Time and time again, I do this and feel like this. But recently, I was listening to George Ezra's new album 'Staying at Tamara's.' I came across a song of his called 'Only Human.' There were some lyrics which really stood out to me. 'You can run, you can jump, might f**k it up - but you can't blame yourself, no, you're just human.' It made me think - I'm only human. I make mistakes, I f**k things up, I can do some things and I can't do other things. But that’s just what being human is all about. When life is getting the better of you and those negative thoughts in your head are becoming too loud and overwhelming for you to drown them out, you just need to remember that YOU ARE HUMAN. So here are five things I want you to remember about being human and five little things that might make you feel just a little better about f*****g things up.
2) It's completely normal to make mistakes No one is perfect. No one has a manual on how to live and do everything right so it's only natural that we make mistakes. Mistakes make you human - if you didn’t make mistakes, then you’d pretty much be some kind of robot. Everyone does it and you're not a bad person for making a mistake so don't beat yourself up. 3) You deserve kindness It doesn't cost anything to be kind but being nice to someone, including yourself, but it can make a whole lot of difference to how you feel and how your day goes from then on. You’re not perfect, no-one is, but that doesn’t mean that you should hate yourself. If you wouldn't speak to someone else that way, then why do you do it to yourself? 4) You are worthy Never ever EVER think that you aren’t worth something. Don’t let anyone, and I mean ANYONE, tell you that you aren’t worth the world. Your self worth isn’t determined by anyone or anything else except you and how you choose to act and behave towards others. You worth is defined by you. So believe that you’re worth something, my star. 5) Not everything is going to go your way If you expect everything to fall into place magically, then I’m sorry but it won’t. Not everything will go how you planned. Not everything will turn out how you expected. So expect the unexpected. If you build up your hopes and live your life based on a plan, things will go wrong. But just because things go a bit pear-shaped, doesn’t mean that you’re a failure and it’s all okay. Life doesn’t run to a schedule and that’s when all the fun happens. I know that it’s easy for me to say these things, and believe me, I’ll be the first person to admit that I’m probably the biggest hypocrite right now. But I’m getting there - I’m learning. And you’ll get there too. I know you will. Happy Halloween! The spooky season is coming up and everyone is getting excited to dress up as their favourite horror movie character, go trick-or-treating and carve pumpkins to put outside their houses. Well, here I am saying everyone - but the fact and the matter of it is, not everyone likes Halloween, and sometimes ‘Happy’ Halloween is not so happy.
I love Halloween. I love the dressing up, I love the parties, I love scaring kids that come to the door and I love the excuse to eat as many sweets as you want. Not everyone is me though. The person behind the door could be a PTSD victim, or a war veteran or have anxiety. This can make Halloween a difficult time for them. It's important that you are respectful to everyone you encounter at Halloween and so you have to apply this to people who don't like Halloween too. So I have a few tips for you on how to be super respectful to those people and how to allow them to feel comfortable in their own home on the scariest night of the year
I know Halloween is a fun time, and I don’t mean to be a party pooper, but you have to consider other people as well as yourself. So this Halloween, just think about who might be behind that door before you knock on it. Kenzie So periods. They’re inconvenient, awkward, painful and annoying. But there are many different methods of making this awkward annoying painful inconvenience less of an inconvenience. I’m talking period products. Today, I’m talking about one period product in particular - the menstrual cup.
For anyone who doesn’t know what periods are, if you’re young and haven’t had one yet or you just haven’t had them explained to you, periods are when a woman or any person with a uterus bleeds from their vagina for 3-7 days, once a month. The uterus is where a baby grows and the lining of the uterus thickens in order to prepare for a fertilised egg to implant and grow into a baby. If an egg hasn’t been fertilised then the uterus lining will begin to ‘shed’ and you will start to bleed. A menstrual cup is pretty much what it says in the name. It is a cup which a period-having person places inside the vagina to catch the blood and neatly contain it. It can hold the blood for up to 12 hours, depending on your cycle and flow, and then you simply take it out, rinse it clean and re-insert. It is totally different to a pad which sits in your underwear to soak up the blood but it is very similar to a tampon, as you also insert a tampon, but the tampon sits higher than a menstrual cup and you have to replace tampons every 4 hours, just like a pad. So all in all, a menstrual cup seems much more convenient. The only thing is I had a disastrous experience with using a menstrual cup. Now when I say disastrous, I’m not exaggerating - in fact, even then I’m probably undermining my experience. For the first 12 hours of wearing it, I thought it was God’s gift to women. It was comfortable, there was no mess, no worries about it leaking. So it was a bit difficult to get in at first but once I’d got the knack, it slid in no problem. I was convinced that I was a menstrual cup convert. No more buying pads or tampons ever again. That was until I came to take it out. 12 hours later, off I pop to the toilet to take it out. 20 minutes later, I am still in the toilet. It becomes an hour later, then an hour and a half. It turns out, these cups aren’t that easy to get out. In fact, for me it was that difficult that the following afternoon I ended up in A&E. It's safe to say that, due to my experience, I will never be using a menstrual cup ever again. That's not to say that they are all bad though. Plenty of people have used them with no issues at all. So here are some of the advantages of using a menstrual cup. Advantages:
But then there are of course still some disadvantages. Disadvantages:
So there are plenty of advantages and disadvantages to using a cup. Personally I would not recommend trying a menstrual cup as the fear of it not coming out is way too great and I can't guarantee that it won't happen to someone else. Plus, they are a relatively new product for periods so how can you guarantee their safety? However, ultimately the decision is yours. It's your body and you need to do what is right for you and your period. Kenzie Feeling sad isn't a nice feeling to feel. You just want to curl up and hide from the world to wallow in your sorrow, but instead it becomes our instinct to stick on a happy mask and just grin and bare it. Somehow, it's easier to show our real feelings when we think we have a reason to feel that way, such as a family death or a relationship breakdown. Because you can't ever be ‘just sad’ without a reason - right?
Wrong, in fact. It's perfectly normal and perfectly valid to be ‘just sad.’ I was like you once. I never knew that you could be ‘just sad.’ I thought that there was a reason for every feeling a human could ever feel, and so when I had these sad days, I hid it from everyone because I didn’t think anybody would understood. I felt so alone, like there was something wrong with me. I thought that if I talked about it, I would be judged and told to ‘get over it’ because my life was good, so I had nothing to be sad about. But I was wrong. One day, when I was getting counselling for my anxiety and PTSD, I spoke to my counsellor about how I was feeling and how I knew it was stupid to feel sad when I had nothing to feel sad about and for some reason, I felt ‘just sad.’ Then she said the most surprising thing to me: ‘It’s okay, that’s completely normal.’ I never would have thought that it was okay or even normal to feel the way I felt. She went on to tell me how everyone had those days and it was just a part of life, but it was okay to feel that way and I shouldn’t feel ashamed or stupid or alone - because I wasn’t any of those things. I realised then that I truly wasn’t stupid for feeling that way, and I wasn’t alone because other people felt the same way as me. From that point onwards, I was more open about when I felt ‘just sad’ and I was told by my mum and my friends that they’d felt that way too, and they still feel it sometimes. So many people feel this way and it’s okay. So for when these days arrive, here are some tips to make those days a little easier to deal with.
2) Spend time with positive people If you spend time with people who are optimistic and positive, they can sometimes help to change your outlook and make you feel more positive about the future. But even if this doesn't happen, being around people allows you to talk about your feelings and lighten the load. 3) Get some exercise It can help your mood to get outside for a bit and get moving. Whether it's a gentle stroll, a jog or a run, or even a bike ride, this outdoor alone time can help to clear your head and get your thoughts in order to make you feel calmer and more at ease. Also, there's the scientific side of it in that it releases dopamine and endorphins which are your feel good hormones and so there is evidence that exercise can make you feel that bit happier. Just being sad, is totally okay and totally normal. However, if you experience this sadness for most of the day, everyday or for over two weeks accompanied with any of the following symptoms, you should visit your GP for a check up:
This is not an exhaustive list but you can find a more detailed list on the NHS website. These symptoms could indicate depression rather than being just sad so make sure to go to your doctor to see if they can help you get better. Just remember: it's okay. You're normal and it's all okay. Kenzie Being told to ‘act your age’ is something you hear a lot. It's when an adult is told to ‘grow up’ or someone is told to ‘stop acting like a four-year-old.’ It's when a child is told to ‘be a proper child’ or to ‘stop being so mature.’ But why is acting your age such a big deal?
When you're told to act your age, the actual definition of that is ‘to behave in a manner appropriate to someone of one's age and not to someone younger or older.’ There is a lot of societal pressure on people to act how they have seen other people their age act. It can be difficult to understand why someone may not be acting as mature as perhaps they should be, or why a child is mature and wise beyond their years. No-one should be treated differently just because they’re maybe typically not acting the way you have seen others act. There are many reasons why someone may act in a childlike state or seem more mature than their age. Reasons for reverting back to childhood could relate to serious traumatic events where they revert back to acting like a child as a form of defence and protection, or it could be something simple and silly like their sense of humour is childlike or they just find it fun. As for why a child could mature quicker, it could be down to biological factors. Everyone is different and different people mature at different rates and stages. It is thought that girls typically mature quicker than boys, and even then there are girls that may seem less mature than boys. It constantly depends on the person. It could also be that they’ve had to ‘grow up quicker’ because of an event in their childhood that has meant they’ve had to deal with it maturely and like a grown-up, such as a death in the family. I was always told as a child by my godmother that I wasn’t a normal child. One thing I vividly remember is going to visit her niece when I was 12 years old and she said to me that her niece was ‘a proper 12-year-old, not like me.’ She didn’t mean anything nasty by that, she just meant that I was more mature than you’d expect a 12-year-old to typically be. My parents told me that I’d had to grow up quickly because I’d lost my grandfather at age 3, my uncle at age 5 and then my grandmother at age 11 - I’d had to deal with more than you’d expect a 12-year-old to deal with and I do believe to this day that I’d forced myself to mature quicker as a coping mechanism to deal with these deaths. Not acting your age isn’t necessarily a bad thing, unless caused by trauma. If you’ve been through a traumatic event, you may find it helpful to go to a professional therapist in order to work through this trauma and work through your feelings so that you can heal. Otherwise, not acting your age isn’t necessarily a bad thing in most situations. In some situations, it can be perceived as insensitive and therefore you need to have the capacity to gauge when it’s okay to be immature compared to when a situation calls for a bit more respect and thought. The following are some examples of when you need to put the aspects of your childlike personality to one side and act your age.
Like I say, it's okay to act mature or even immature sometimes. Just make sure you evaluate the situation first to ensure it is appropriate and to make sure that you won't ruin something for someone else. When teenagers in the UK turn 16, they move from secondary school to sixth form or college. For most, this means a new environment, new teachers, new subjects and just generally lots of new things to deal with. One of these new things is the exams - in secondary school you do GCSEs, while in sixth form you instead do A Levels.
When I was getting ready to move to sixth form, my Year 11 teachers were all saying how hard it was going to be to go from GCSE to A Level. I kind of just disregarded it and was like ‘yeah yeah, sure, but I'll deal with it - it'll be fine.’ But BOY, did I underestimate just how big that jump was and just how hard it was going to be to adjust. When it comes to A-Level exams, it is a lot more application based. At GCSE, you're mostly expected to memorise a bunch of knowledge and then regurgitate it onto a piece of paper with some relevant questions on it. A Level is very different from that. You not only have to memorise the basic knowledge but you then have to use that knowledge to apply it to any given scenario in the exam. For example, in my Psychology exam, we had a question about why eating disorders may develop. However, rather than the question just being ‘explain the reasons why someone may develop an eating disorder’ we got given a big old scenario about this girl and her family situation with all sorts of seemingly irrelevant information thrown in for good measure and then told to explain why her specific eating disorder may have developed, explicitly referring to and quoting the information given to us. This would be a 12 mark question and if we didn't refer to the given scenario, we could get no higher than 6 marks. Saying this, I think the reason for this difference may partly be because if you tried to memorise all the information you need to know at A Level, your brain may explode. Of course, I'm exaggerating a little here but what I'm trying to say is that there is so much more content at A Level than GCSE. You learn more content about one subject in those two years of sixth form than you ever could have in the five years of secondary school. At secondary school, you might have one fairly small text book for everything you've learnt over those five years. However, I get to sixth form and I have at least two textbooks per year for each subject and I'm starting with four subjects before dropping down to the compulsory three in Year 2. It's worrying, to say the least. As well as the differences in the format of the exams, there were differences in the way the lessons were taught. In secondary school, you were usually told what you had to write in your notebook, what information was relevant and you were almost ‘spoon fed’ I suppose you could say. At sixth form, they are trying to prepare you for university. So you may be given a bit of help in what you might need to note down, but in the end you have to decide what needs noting and what doesn't and you have to be much more efficient in your method of note taking as you are given very little time to do so. You have to use abbreviations and acronyms plentifully or else you will miss a whole chunk of information because you're trying to finish writing the last chunk. It's very independence focused and you have to be prepared for that. To go along with this, you have to be responsible for your own learning. In secondary school, teachers would forever be chasing you for homework and would nag at you if you missed a lesson and would listen to the same old excuses over and over again, like ‘I left my memory stick at home’ or that old chestnut of ‘the dog ate my homework.’ In sixth form, you don't get any of that. It is your decision and you'll pay the consequences if you don't get the results you wanted. You need to have some serious discipline to cope with this amount of responsibility and be extremely motivated to succeed and do the work and this was something I sometimes struggled with, usually when I was stressed. Too much stress for me equalled a lack of motivation - I had given up. I'm aware that now that you've read this, if you're about to go to sixth form, you're possibly now thinking ‘oh God, what on Earth have I let myself in for?’ and I don't blame you for thinking that. It's not all bad though. A good thing about A Levels though in comparison to GCSEs is the choice of subjects. At GCSE, you have a list of set subjects that you have to do, you have no choice. English Literature, English Language, Maths, Biology, Physics, Chemistry etc. I hated Physics at secondary school. So when I got to A Level, the fact that I didn't have to do Physics ever again made me very happy. I got to choose subjects that I actually had an interest in. This made learning more enjoyable because I actually cared. Despite there seemingly being more difficulties and disadvantages than advantages, you can and you will cope. Sure, I struggled a lot and I nearly ended up dropping out after Year 1 and then considered not doing my Year 2 exams the week before they were due to start, but I did get through it in the end with a C in Sociology, a D in Psychology, a B in Photography and an AS Level (Year 1) B grade in English Language. So I'm going to give you my tips for coping with the transition and the workload. All I ask of you is that you do take this advice on board. A lot of this advice is advice I was given before I went to sixth form and I didn't listen but how I wish that I had.
So yes, sixth form is a hard and scary experience but you can definitely do this. Believe me - I know you can. You got this. The time comes in everyone's life at some point when they have to get a job. It doesn't matter what the job is, where the job is, how old you are or any other interchangeable features. But how do you get started with getting a job, especially your first job? That's what I hope to help you with.
If you've read my previous article on starting a new job, you will know that I recently started a new job - my first job. Well, I say recently - I've now been working there for six months. Six months, can you believe it! But as I say, this was my first job. I knew nothing about how to get a job or how to act in an interview for a job. I feel that this is the same for many teens in Britain these days. Like I say, I knew nothing about how to get a job. Sixth form seems to be very university-centred and teaches you how to write a personal statement and apply for university but not how to write a cover letter or a CV. I had to rely on my next door neighbour to help me perfect my CV and cover letter because I had no idea what I was doing. The first draft I ever did of my CV was truly rubbish and I basically had to redo it all before my neighbour would give it a proper look. The amount of help and guidance you are given by sixth form centres when you are choosing to work rather than go to university is very limited. As if getting a job isn't difficult enough in life with jobs being cut and unemployment rising, being young and having no preparation makes it even more difficult than you could ever imagine. However, here are some tips for you on what could help you to find your first job a little easier and make employers pick you over the other candidates at an interview.
Whatever you do in life, just don't give up. One day, you will find a job that's perfect for you and you will rock that interview and be awesome at what you do. You got this! Being a teenager is a confusing time for anyone. You're growing hair in weird places, your body is changing and you generally don't really know what's happening. So, imagine how confusing it must be when you start getting feelings for people. But not just feelings for any people. Feelings for people who are the same gender as you.
Bisexuality is something which has become much more widely recognised over recent years. There is no longer just gay and straight but there is everything else in between. But does having feelings for another girl or another boy mean you are bisexual? I first had feelings for a girl when I was 13. I was quite young and although I wasn't from a homophobic family, despite my nan's insensitive comments and increasing disgust at gay men, it really freaked me out. I went into meltdown mode and decided that the best way to deal with these feelings was to ignore them and combat them by asking out every boy who I even found remotely attractive. I somehow thought that everyone could see the feelings I was having for girls and that asking loads of boys out would convince them I was straight. Of course that wasn't true. No-one could tell I was crushing on a girl and, to be honest, me asking out loads of boys just made it more obvious that I was overcompensating for something. The first thing to address is that having a crush on someone of the same gender does not necessarily mean you're bisexual. You're young and now is the time to experiment with who you are and who you want to be with. You can be with a guy or a girl or whoever you want to be with. You may realise that you don't like dating a girl or you don't like dating a boy or you may realise you only like dating one of them or you may decide that you like both. Whatever you decide, that's okay. You've got time to figure it out. Number two, don't feel like you have to label yourself. You are free to date whoever you want to date. There aren't any rules. You don't have to say that you're one thing or the other, not now - not ever, if you don't want to. Love is love, regardless of gender. And finally, remember to be proud. You don't have to be ashamed. There's nothing wrong with you and you aren't doing anything bad or naughty. What you're feeling is perfectly normal and you shouldn't be made to feel like it isn't. Own who you are like the boss you are and if anyone dares to put you down because they aren't doing what you're doing, just know in your heart that you are awesome, that you are beautiful and that you are normal. If you're still struggling, there are some more amazing articles right here on the site as well as these websites which could help you out. www.stonewall.org.uk www.biresource.org www.bisexualindex.org.uk www.pride.com www.theproudtrust.org However you're feeling, just hang in there. You'll be okay. Kenzie Everybody hurts sometimes. That feeling of pain and guilt and worthlessness is totally, absolutely, 100% normal. It's not a nice feeling but it's a normal feeling.
I've felt worthless more than once. In fact, I've felt worthless more times than I care to remember. I've lost count by this point. For almost as long as I can remember, I've experienced feelings of being worthless and useless and not having a purpose. I know how that feels and it's horrible. But whenever I feel this way, there are five things that I try to remember. They help me to accept myself just the way I am and believe that I am full of worth. You never know, they might just help you realise just how loved and cared for you are and might help you see that you are worth more than you will ever know. Accept compliments when compliments are due. I've never been good at accepting compliments. My natural reaction when someone tells me something nice such as they like my hair, or think my clothes are cool is to go all shy and blush and say ‘thank you’ but walk away as quickly as I can. I try to forget anything was said. That's not how it should be. Accepting a compliment doesn't make you selfish or conceited. You should agree with them and say ‘yes, thank you, I love my clothes’ and sound confident. It's okay to believe that you're beautiful. It's okay to have self acceptance. Never let anyone tell you that you aren't beautiful or you are worthless. People are guaranteed to drag you down and tell you that you're ugly or worthless. The people who tell you this often have issues of their own and want to project their hurt on to somebody else so that they can feel better and make someone else feel small, so someone else can know how they feel. But you are beautiful, no matter what they say. Your self worth is not determined by anybody else. In the words of RuPaul: ‘if you can't love yourself, how the hell are you going to love someone else?’ Your situation is temporary. Every situation that you're put in is temporary. Every day is different, there's always something new to explore and experience. That means that the way you're feeling now, the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad situation that you're in will pass. It won't be that way forever. You might not believe it now, but believe me. I've been there and it gets better. Some things in the world are really ugly and things that no one should ever have to see or experience, but when you look past all that then you see all the good in the world. It's an amazing world and you will experience that once this darkness has passed. Don't underestimate yourself. You may not think you're capable of anything worthwhile. You may not think you're clever enough to invent a cure for cancer. You may not think you're generous enough to end poverty. You may not think you're strong enough to build houses for all the homeless. The truth is, you may not be - but you don't need to change the world. Just by being alive, you are changing someone's life. They wouldn't be the person they are today without you, just like you wouldn't be the person you are today without them. You can change their life and you will impact them. You are important. So long as you believe in yourself, and believe in that then you can try everything and try anything. You can try whatever you put your mind to. Don't. Give. Up. This is a cliche heard many times before but it really is worth it. Everyone feels like giving up every once in a while. I've felt that so many times. I've been close once or twice too. But I never did. I kept going. You never know how close you are to everything you've always wanted and if you give up, you'll never get there. You need to give yourself a chance. You will have a good life but you have to give yourself the chance to do so. Don't ever give up. Please. I went in to these five things in more detail in a YouTube video I made in 2016. Yes, it's old but it's not outdated. These things are always relevant. https://youtu.be/4AibTCNutcE If you think you need some professional help or any more advice, here are some websites which could help you out. NHS: https://www.nhs.uk/ MIND: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/ PSYCHOLOGY TODAY: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/finding-love/201105/how-love-yourself-first ASK MY GP: https://askmygp.uk/ LLOYDS PHARMACY: https://onlinedoctor.lloydspharmacy.com/ PUSH: https://www.pushdoctor.co.uk/ ‘It will all be okay in the end. If it isn't okay, then it isn't the end.’ - John Lennon Kenzie |