What Does Christmas Mean To Me?

When I was a wee girl, Christmas was my favourite time of year! Seeing all the sparkly lights, flashing. Decorating the house in festive decorations we’ve had for years as a family. Most importantly, opening the presents that were brought by Santa and Rudolf!

But now, being a 20 year old it’s hard to focus on what to get your loved ones for Christmas. But also, if you suffer from depression like myself it’s hard to get in the festive spirit and put on a smile. 

Looking back at my childhood around this time of year, I can say I can’t remember half of it as after suffering with seizures it makes me forget a lot of stuff, that’s really hard to say but I just got to come to terms with it. 

Some memories I can picture in my head but, yet again I’m not sure when and where that memory took place. So, now I look forward to making this Christmas a special one even though I don’t feel like it is Christmas. I still want to make memories that I can write about and take photos with my family too. 

Some things I got planned for this Christmas are some fun activities for when my grandparents come around like; 

- playing Cards Against Humanity, which is an adult card game and on the cards are rude sentences which are more funny and it’s better than sitting on your phone for Christmas.

- Obviously, the big famous Christmas meal but because I can’t eat a lot whilst in front of people I just get a small bowl and help myself to what I wish to eat and what makes me comfortable. 

- Playing our traditional Christmas game, Monopoly! Apparently, every year me and my family play this but I can’t remember this.

So, what does Christmas mean to me? It means it’s family time, appreciating every moment we have together as a family because one day, that could all change. 

Also, this year I’m thinking of doing something a wee bit different. I’m going to donate a few things to children and families who are struggling with money. Just to see a smile on their faces as they have received something for Christmas, it just makes you feel better as a person. I believe this will also have a positive affect on my mental state too, especially my depression just making me feel like I’ve done something nice for someone else as I love helping people. 

• Mel​