Some things I want you to hear

Everybody hurts sometimes. That feeling of pain and guilt and worthlessness is totally, absolutely, 100% normal. It's not a nice feeling but it's a normal feeling.

I've felt worthless more than once. In fact, I've felt worthless more times than I care to remember. I've lost count by this point. For almost as long as I can remember, I've experienced feelings of being worthless and useless and not having a purpose. I know how that feels and it's horrible. But whenever I feel this way, there are five things that I try to remember. They help me to accept myself just the way I am and believe that I am full of worth. You never know, they might just help you realise just how loved and cared for you are and might help you see that you are worth more than you will ever know.

Accept compliments when compliments are due.
I've never been good at accepting compliments. My natural reaction when someone tells me something nice such as they like my hair, or think my clothes are cool is to go all shy and blush and say ‘thank you’ but walk away as quickly as I can. I try to forget anything was said. That's not how it should be. Accepting a compliment doesn't make you selfish or conceited. You should agree with them and say ‘yes, thank you, I love my clothes’ and sound confident. It's okay to believe that you're beautiful. It's okay to have self acceptance.

Never let anyone tell you that you aren't beautiful or you are worthless.
People are guaranteed to drag you down and tell you that you're ugly or worthless. The people who tell you this often have issues of their own and want to project their hurt on to somebody else so that they can feel better and make someone else feel small, so someone else can know how they feel. But you are beautiful, no matter what they say. Your self worth is not determined by anybody else. In the words of RuPaul: ‘if you can't love yourself, how the hell are you going to love someone else?’

Your situation is temporary.
Every situation that you're put in is temporary. Every day is different, there's always something new to explore and experience. That means that the way you're feeling now, the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad situation that you're in will pass. It won't be that way forever. You might not believe it now, but believe me. I've been there and it gets better. Some things in the world are really ugly and things that no one should ever have to see or experience, but when you look past all that then you see all the good in the world. It's an amazing world and you will experience that once this darkness has passed.

Don't underestimate yourself.
You may not think you're capable of anything worthwhile. You may not think you're clever enough to invent a cure for cancer. You may not think you're generous enough to end poverty. You may not think you're strong enough to build houses for all the homeless. The truth is, you may not be - but you don't need to change the world. Just by being alive, you are changing someone's life. They wouldn't be the person they are today without you, just like you wouldn't be the person you are today without them. You can change their life and you will impact them. You are important. So long as you believe in yourself, and believe in that then you can try everything and try anything. You can try whatever you put your mind to.

Don't. Give. Up.
This is a cliche heard many times before but it really is worth it. Everyone feels like giving up every once in a while. I've felt that so many times. I've been close once or twice too. But I never did. I kept going. You never know how close you are to everything you've always wanted and if you give up, you'll never get there. You need to give yourself a chance. You will have a good life but you have to give yourself the chance to do so. Don't ever give up. Please.

I went in to these five things in more detail in a YouTube video I made in 2016. Yes, it's old but it's not outdated. These things are always relevant.
https://youtu.be/4AibTCNutcE

If you think you need some professional help or any more advice, here are some websites which could help you out.
NHS: https://www.nhs.uk/
MIND: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/
PSYCHOLOGY TODAY: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/finding-love/201105/how-love-yourself-first
ASK MY GP: https://askmygp.uk/
LLOYDS PHARMACY: https://onlinedoctor.lloydspharmacy.com/
PUSH: https://www.pushdoctor.co.uk/

‘It will all be okay in the end. If it isn't okay, then it isn't the end.’ - John Lennon

​Kenzie