facing the truth of bulimia nervosa

I’ve been experiencing bulimia for most of my teenage years. My ‘problems’ started in high school, where everyone sees this certain image you have to be, to be accepted by. That’s when the restricting started. I would hold back from food, I would make up excuses like “I’ve already eaten” or “I’m not hungry”. Back then I had no clue what damage I was doing but, nearly half a year later, my body finally let me know.

I collapsed. I was rushed to my local hospital. I went for tests to check my sugar levels and all the other ordinary tests. When I had woken back up, I had my family to answer to. I was so scared about telling them what I was doing. I tried and tried to hold the truth in but, it just came out when the doctors said that I was underweight.

After this I explained to my family why I was restricting myself. I talked about how I didn’t want to set foot back into that school because of the bullying so, in turn, my parents moved me schools and forced me to start therapy. At this point, I didn’t believe in recovery. I didn’t believe I deserved to recover or to be happy again. 
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So as my therapy started, a few months down the line I saw a change in my health. I did get healthier and yes, I was eating. But there was still that thought in the back of my head that kept screaming that I needed to lose more weight. That’s when I met bulimia nervosa. I would binge on food that I hadn’t eaten for years due to the whole restricting myself. Then I would go to the bathroom to make myself purge. It was not a pretty sight, let me tell you that, but at the current moment in time it felt that I had to do it.

Then, it became a habit and soon led to an addiction.

I would stop socialising, stop going out to places with my parents and overall just kept myself to myself. I always stayed in the house; my mood went up and down. Also, I started to bunk off school which later affected my grades. If you asked me now do I regret skipping school then my answer is a strong yes. But I can’t change what happened in the past but what I can do is work on my future.
   
​So, as this began to happen I didn’t realise what I was doing to my physical health and wellbeing. I just want to advise anyone who is going through this or reading this right now, it’s not worth it. It’s not worth putting your body through this physical harm. So I really recommend going to see a specialist or even just opening up to someone like a family member or trusted friend. Also, the team here at Teenagers with Experience are more than happy to help you out and give you advice on your current situation. We are here to help you through the tough times; we just want to see you smiling again.

​That’s a wrap from me! -Mel.

Here are a few links for you to check out for further information;
Rehab treatment - https://www.rehab4addiction.co.uk/bulimia-signs-symptoms-treatments?gclid=CjwKCAjwjZjZBRAZEiwAPeLSK-840tGTeQehpAjTWeNzP_1xF46iQd_yGiWUsJ-gqkmU6jv9Z7R0DhoCZvcQAvD_BwE
More information about the mental illness and helplines - http://www.priorygroup.com/eating-disorders/bulimia-nervosa