Stayin' alive

“Why continue living? No one cares about me. Things will never get better.”

Suicide. If you’re lucky, you’ve only heard about it in books, or the news. However, chances are that you are one of the many millions of people affected by suicide directly, whether it was a family member or your own thoughts.

Several symptoms might show if someone is feeling suicidal or acting on these thoughts. They can include -

• feeling depressed, withdrawn or anxious
• loss of interest in work, socialising or even their appearance
• expressing feelings of hopelessness
• acting impulsively or in a reckless way
• giving away possessions or making a will

There is rarely a single thing that makes someone want to end their own life. Experts believe that a number of complex issues can make someone feel this way. Certain things can make someone more likely to think about suicide. These might include difficult life events (family deaths, ending of a relationship), misusing drugs or alcohol, having a mental disorder(often depression or personality disorders), or having a physical health condition, especially if this causes pain or serious disability.
A person may choose to end their lives to:

• escape what they feels is an impossible situation,
• relieve unbearable thoughts or feelings,
• relieve physical pain or incapacity.

However, if you’re reading this, it’s not too late. You are still breathing, reaching out, searching for reasons as to why you shouldn’t just disappear. You’re fighting the world: but as much as it feels like it, you’re not fighting alone. Suicidal thoughts can affect anyone, of any age, of any background, at any time. For every person that reaches out and starts their journey to recovery, there’s another slowly slipping away.
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As someone who suffers from these thoughts, and has attempted to act on them, I just want to let people know that it's okay to live for a TV show you haven't finished, or your dog, or even in anticipation of a driver's test. People say to live for yourself, to not live for temporary things. But as one disappears, you can find another. Keep searching for whatever matters to you, whatever needs you, and live for it. Even if it's something small: your friend, your books, your windowsill plants. If you can identify these small, beautiful things to live for, eventually the day will come when you can live for yourself.
Isla xx