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The deal with divorce

28/5/2019

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Having parents that are divorced can be hard and it has its pros and cons. Some pros can be having private time with each of your parents or having 2 Christmas dinners (like I did yay). However it does come with cons such as having to travel in between both houses regularly and your parents arguing. Approximately 50% American children will see their parents marriage break and 106,959 same-sex couples in the UK went through a divorce.
This is a lot, which means that a lot of people can relate to this topic I will give advice on.


When I was 6, my mum and dad divorced and I proceeded to lose contact with my dad for 4 years for multiple reasons he won’t want on the internet. To me, I think that I found it quite easy to deal with the divorce because I didn’t quite understand what was happening until I lost contact with him. However now I didn’t have a solid father figure in my life (I didn’t count my then step-dad) like most people I knew. I feel like this permanently gave me the idea that all men are like my dad and it put me off relationships for a while.

However once I gained contact with my dad again I was about 10, it was slow and steady process. He had a new girlfriend and we had quite a lot to catch up on. We went to his house basically every weekend which I found annoying as it was too much fuss for me. Also my parents were arguing again, about money mostly and this really dampened my spirits as I thought my life would be back on track. It has basically been that way ever since and I’m now 15.

I have some advice for someone who has parents going through a divorce. Don’t try to get involved too much because it will most likely hurt you in the process. I would also advise that you need to realise that you don’t have to live with your parents forever. This means that if the divorce is unbearable, you won’t have to be there for long. Since you are reading this on Teenagers With Experience, I will assume that you are a teenager and it will only be a couple of years until you can live and fend for yourself. Another piece of advice I have is that you need to try to distance yourself from any negativity. I know how hard it is to see your parents fighting however you need to go either into your room or out with your friends so it doesn’t affect your mentality too much.


In conclusion, don’t be upset that your parents are getting a divorce/already divorced. They have most likely done it for your benefit so they don’t impact the most crucial years of your life. Stay positive and try to keep away from any negative vibes. It will probably be hard but then again it wasn’t meant to be easy. Someone is always there for you, especially me! I’m only a message away ❤️

Ellie
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Teenagers With Experience is an online organisation created to provide teenagers worldwide with an online platform to share their own experiences to be able to help, inform and educate others on  a variety of different topics. We aim to provide a safe space to all young people. You can contact us via email, social media or our contact form.

Please note that the content on this website is created by teenagers. While we strive to provide accurate and helpful information, it is important to remember that we are not professional experts. If you are experiencing a crisis or need professional advice, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional or a helpline.​

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