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Shark week

7/6/2024

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Disclaimer: This article is only my experience and uses rather theatrical language. If you came here seeking a realistic portrayal of periods, either refer to the last paragraph or talk to a trusted adult or doctor.

Since the beginning of time, women have had to deal with blood streaming out of their vagina while their hormones wreak havoc on their emotions and their uterus tries to consume them from the inside out; or at least that’s the description I use to terrify my guy friends. In reality, it’s pretty manageable for most. 

Let’s start with the science behind menstruation: It normally starts between the ages of 8 and 16 and continues its cycle until your 40s or 50s, when menopause begins (Read “Your Menstrual Cycle” on womenshealth.gov for more information). Each cycle lasts approximately 28 days; this includes the start of your period, the end of your period, ovulation, etc. Basically, during the 2-7+ day period, your eggs are maturing, meaning it’s ready to be fertilized. With this, your uterine lining thickens to prepare for the release of the eggs. If you don’t get pregnant during this ovulation period, your uterus realizes there is no use for it and sheds the blood that was making it thick and squishy. The tissue, blood, and nutrients flow out of your vagina – hence the red stained underwear - and you thank goodness you aren’t pregnant (Unless you’re trying to get pregnant, obviously)! This process causes physical symptoms such as cramps, bloating, nausea, breakouts, sore breasts, and fatigue along with emotional symptoms like mood swings.


Well, that was more than school will ever teach us about the female body! Now that we have that out of the way, I’ll explain the less gross and more mentally draining portion of periods. Keep in mind that periods are different for everyone. Some may have a short, light, and fairly easy experience while others, like me, book a vacation to hell for over a week. In fact, I’ve been described on many occasions as Satan while on my period, which is fair.


I have a love/hate relationship with my menstrual cycle. On one hand, it’s a sign I’m not pregnant; on the other, it pulverizes my physical and emotional being (which is just a bit dramatic). Before my lovely first visit from Aunt Flow, I was a rather stable person (excluding the severe depression, but that’s an article for another day). Then, I became this dramatic, sensitive, malicious blood-spewing ball of negativity. Anything and anyone irritates me, I feel like crying every 5 minutes, and my depression becomes seemingly amplified. If my mood swings weren’t enough, I also undergo truly monstrous cramps, an unnecessarily heavy flow, and extreme nausea. Thankfully, I only endure this side of myself like 2-4 times a year as it’s quite irregular. 


If you also endure the devil in your uterus, here are some things I have found to be helpful during those times:
  • Cramps: HEATING PADS and your choice of pain medication!! I can’t stress enough how much they help me. You can buy the medication over the counter, unless those don’t help then you should talk to your doctor and get a prescription for a heavier medication meant to relieve periods. I find exercise, curling into a ball and crying, a long nap, and masturbation also aid in cramp relief.
  • Mood swings: I would recommend avoiding or eliminating all triggers. If there is a specific person or thing that you know will annoy you, either talk to the person and let them know that you are simply not in the head space to hang out or speak to them (but don’t be rude) or steer clear of them. Additionally, try to find something that calms you. Personally, watching my favorite show, reading my favorite book, or taking a few minutes out of my day to abuse my pillows works well.

​
For those of you who haven’t experienced your period yet, the depiction mentioned above is a dramatic way of describing my experience. Like I said before, no menstrual cycle is the same. You might not have a terrible cycle – however if you do, refer to the advice above. They also aren’t some nasty, taboo thing that shouldn’t be talked about. They’re something normal that should be talked about more. Always remember your body is a perfectly beautiful and normal thing! 


-Katelyn

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Periods & Mental Health- What’s the link?

26/6/2022

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Periods are natural and nothing to be ashamed of. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. We must not only normalise the physical impact they have, but also the effect they have on mental health too. Instead of shaming others, we must focus on promoting love and support during this stressful time. Whether you are reading this and relate to menstruation affecting your mental health, or want to help those close to you, I hope I can offer some useful tips in tackling this monthly battle. 

Over 90% of menstruating people suffer from at least one symptom of Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS), including headaches, feeling upset, anxiety, irritability, tiredness and bloating. Linked to this, Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) is a health problem similar to PMS but causes more serious symptoms, like severe irritability, depression and anxiety, and these can present themselves a week or two before the period actually starts and ease two or three days after it has begun. Yet, there is still the stigma that people on their periods are overreacting and seeking attention, even though they may be having an internal war with themselves, facing a formidable opponent to their personal growth and success. 

While hormones are real chemicals that affect us, the destructive thoughts they bring do not in any way represent who we are, our intelligence, our talents and our overall mental health. It is natural to feel so emotionally distressed during menstruation that you may feel you can’t get out of bed. Hopelessness may cripple you, isolating you from the happiness you may have felt the day before and the happiness that may be found in the future. I assure you, the thoughts that are engendered during this time of the month can be soothed and there is always a way for you to prepare yourself mentally, before this self-deprecating version of yourself takes your place temporarily.

Before I began to question why I was feeling so despondent and angry during my period, I felt lonely and frustrated with the fact that I couldn’t control my emotions. This still happens now; sometimes I don’t even recognise who I am on my period. I find my thoughts being damaging towards my dreams, my regrets and my self courage. As someone who isn’t a stranger to ill-temper, I find that before, during and after my period, I react badly to those around me and I’ll admit, I say things I don’t mean and find no relief in slamming a door or two after an argument I caused to erupt. Feeling alone, I become restless, unable to sleep and losing passion for my interests. Finding control during menstruation isn’t a simple process and even after finding ways to cope, I sometimes find it impossible to counteract unhealthy thoughts. 
 
Imagine training to become an Olympic athlete, being dedicated to wake up early every morning and train, only to be told by your biggest supporter, AKA yourself, that you don’t deserve to succeed/ you can’t succeed/ you don’t want to. Not everyone has a lifelong ambition to become an athlete, but as humans, we strive to become better versions of ourselves, in whatever makes us happiest. Personally, I love to write, but I’ve found that on my period, I tend to doubt my writing ability and words I’ve written before suddenly seem worthless and terrible. I also find my brain trying to convince me I hate my favourite book and it can be difficult to find enjoyment in anything. This is reality; this is life, for a lot of us. But don’t be deterred from trying a few coping mechanisms, because I assure you, you don’t have anything to lose and some of these have really alleviated the symptoms I experience when on my period.

How to care for yourself during menstruation:

  1. Be kind to yourself. Seriously, whenever you feel discomfort or the slightest bit of frustration in yourself, think: am I being kind to myself? How can I be kind to myself? Leaving tasks, sacrificing diets or simply letting yourself go from your responsibilities as a human being won’t make you suffer lifelong consequences. Whenever you can, give yourself a break, and NEVER feel guilty about doing so.
  2. Make a ‘Comfort List.’ If you’re struggling to find happiness during your period, this can be something used to inspire your self-care. This can be anything from your favourite books and movies to your happy place(s) and your favourite snacks. I understand that your brain might try to convince you that you abhor your favourite TV series, but associating the items on the list with comfort can help to counteract this.
  3. Find a Comfort Space. Create a mental association with this sanctuary for positive thoughts of solitude and peace. This may provide you with an escape and allow you to feel more at ease. You may be surrounded by blankets and pillows or sitting on a bench in the most tranquil part of your local park. Experiment!
  4. Create a relaxing playlist. Chances are, with cramps and headaches, you won’t want to listen to punk rock while you’re in your comfort space. Pick the most soothing songs, ones that don’t invade your head with high pitched sounds, raging distorted guitars or cacophonous instrumentation. Find your comfort voice, one that instantly soothes those wrathful thoughts.
  5. Forget about the past and the future. It can be incredibly difficult to drag yourself away from past regrets and trepidation about the future, even more so when you’re on your period. Try to focus on the present and connect with the atmosphere around you, or for some, it may help to transport yourself to another world, like in a fantasy novel.
  6. Quotes! Download an app called Motivation or read some poetry. Write down the most uplifting ones in a journal for you to come back to. 
  7. Stay away from caffeine, sugar and alcohol. These can aggravate headaches, cramps and disrupt your sleep. Drinking lots of water is so important, alongside fruit and vegetables.
  8. REST! Pain may cause sleep deprivation, so if you can’t sleep, rest your eyes or just simply give yourself a few hours to relax.

How you can help others:

  1. Give them physical and emotional space. Don’t suffocate them with demanding questions about their mental state or force them to tell you what’s bothering them. I find that a question that really infuriates me on my period and I struggle to answer is: are you okay? How are you? What’s wrong? Instead, become more practical. What can I do to help? Is there anything I can get you? If not, solitude may be what they need. Others may prefer a non-judgemental and supportive presence without directly asking about what they’re going through.
  2. Silent understanding and unspoken support. Don’t remind them that they’re on their period, they know! 
  3. Rise above hurtful comments. As I’ve mentioned before, unprovoked resentment is common during menstruation. If someone close to you has said something to instigate a dispute, they most likely didn’t mean it. If you have been affected by their words, talk to them about it later or talk to someone else. An argument may be what you think they’re looking for, but below the surface, this could distress them further.
  4. Redirect their thoughts to a safer reality. If they are comfortable in talking, don’t mention that they’re bloated or have a sudden reappearance of spots. If they express doubts or anxieties, try not to offer a cliched response. Instead, reassure them that it’s okay to take a mental day off and come back to tackle the problem when they’re themselves again.

I cannot stress enough the importance of understanding mental health during menstruation, as if you’re not self-aware, you may not only hurt yourself but also hurt others. If you think you have severe symptoms, please don’t hesitate to see a doctor. There are many options out there and people who can help, such as cognitive behavioural therapy and fluoxetine- an antidepressant. If you already have a mental illness, your mental health can ameliorate during your period and you should never suffer alone. Talk to a loved one and explain how you’re feeling, as even if they don’t comprehend it now, they will once you have.

We’re here at TWE to help if you ever have any concerns or doubts and honestly, contact me or anyone from the team if you ever need someone to talk to.

-Nicole 

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/seeking-help-for-a-mental-health-problem/where-to-start/

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Teenagers With Experience is an online organisation created to provide teenagers worldwide with an online platform to share their own experiences to be able to help, inform and educate others on  a variety of different topics. We aim to provide a safe space to all young people. You can contact us via email, social media or our contact form.

Please note that the content on this website is created by teenagers. While we strive to provide accurate and helpful information, it is important to remember that we are not professional experts. If you are experiencing a crisis or need professional advice, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional or a helpline.​

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